Saturday, January 1, 2011

Cleaning out the files

by Phil Houseal, as published in the Kerrville Community Journal, Jan 5, 2011

The brand new Club Ed catalogs are out, and readers should have received your copy by now. I’ll be writing in more detail about all the learning opportunities, but I thought I’d start the year cleaning out some Random Observations I’ve collected. They are:

Comedians never laugh.

A good description of most public ceremonies: Platitude-infested events.

If seasonal "treats" such as eggnog, fruitcake, and peanut brittle are so delicious, why don't we eat them the rest of the year?

We spend our youth trying hard to stand out. In old age, we work every day to not disappear.

New word = Glim. It is a combination of “glum” and “dim” as in “the outlook is increasingly glim.”

Just because you argue better doesn’t mean you’re right.

PR paradox: When no one will listen to us, we speak louder. When we reach a position where the world is listening, we measure our words.

As social animals, we seek out our own kind. Watch at any gathering. See the teens giggling together. Listen to the graying men talk business. Hear the moms compare baby stories; the gossipers gossip. The next time you come home from a party and complain about the inadequacy of the guests, know that you are talking about yourself.

Being labeled as "dust" is a compliment, not an epithet.
Dust particles are the most common nuclei around which water vapor condenses in the formation of raindrops and snowflakes.
Dust in the atmosphere regulates the amount of solar radiation reaching the earth's surface, thereby playing a vital role in global temperatures.
Dust carries needed nutrients onto the surface of the oceans, providing food and materials for plankton and algae.

There is no such thing as momentum, when used to assume there is a linear and measurable link between an event that happens this week and one that will happen next week (such as ball games). Yet we as humans try to see patterns and cause/effect where none exist. The second of two games between two different teams on two different nights has no connection with the first event. Events are digital, not analog.

Want to create support for light rail? Make it a roller coaster. People will line up and pay to ride between New Braunfels and San Marcos.

Driving to work, I noticed a Scottish terrier leaping about in a yard. It was harassing a golden tabby, which was lying at the terrier's prancing feet.
How irritating, I thought, that the dog is bothering that beautiful cat. But as I drove past, the true scenario appeared. The dog was chained to a tree. The cat had positioned itself just inches beyond the reach of the chain. Its tail twitched tantalizingly in the face of the yapping dog.
'Twas the cat that teased the dog.

To me the ideal attitude is to have an uninhibited mind coupled with a disciplined body. We should not fear thinking extravagant thoughts; we should eschew an extravagant lifestyle.

A great artist said he was lucky he wasn't cursed with a happy childhood.

We have no control over time. All we can control is what we pay attention to.

The duty of every writer: First engage; then enlighten.

xxx

The new Spring 2011 Club Ed catalogs have arrived in all Hill Country mailboxes. You can also pick up copies at the library. For information or to sign up, click www.clubed.net, or call 830-895-4386.

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